From the Archives: New Year New You

It was supposed to be just another meaningless resolution, the kind that was made and broken by millions of people every year. Billy hadnā€™t even been that specific, stating only that he wanted to ā€œlearn to let goā€ in the coming year, and that heā€™d like to ā€œlean into what made him unique.ā€ After twenty five years of being relatively unremarkable and unassuming, heā€™d wanted to spread his wings a little, with the emphasis being on those last two words.

Instead, heā€™d been thrown into the deep end. Billy hadnā€™t envisioned a universal overhaul. What he had in mind was more along the lines of being willing to talk to strangers at the gym or at the bar, and maybe spruce up his wardrobe a little bit. At most, maybe heā€™d finally take a crack at karaoke. He certainly hadnā€™t intended to undergo a cosmic makeover, to have his life as he knew it completely turned upside down.

The problem with leaning into what made him unique was a lack of starting resources. While relatively fit and handsome, Billy had always been attractively average. He was in shape without being shredded or massive, and he was neither overly short nor overly tall, with sharp features that could be either cute or awkward depending on what he did with his mop of chocolate hair. Billy was far from the worst looking guy in the locker room, but he wasnā€™t anywhere near the most impressive, sporting a package that was as average as the rest of him. Even the clothes he covered that body with were unremarkable, consisting mostly of boxers, jeans and drab t-shirts when he wasnā€™t at work, and generic ā€œbusiness casualā€ when he was.

So when it came to accentuating the elements that made him unique, Billy didnā€™t know where to start. He had a surprisingly perky rear given the rest of his relatively lean build, but that had always been more of an embarrassment than anything else, certainly not something heā€™d want to draw further attention to. In general, when it came to his body, Billy was modest at best. He always fucked in the dark and he didnā€™t even like going shirtless at the beach, and while those things fell under his goal of lightening up a little, flaunting his body wasnā€™t at all what he had in mind when it came to the things that made him special.

The problem was that his job and hobbies werenā€™t any more exciting. He worked in the finance department at an international corporation, just one of thousands of faceless employees, and his extracurricular activities consisted of trips to the gym, maybe a couple happy hours, and the occasional hook up. Billy had a solid group of friends and got along great with his roommate, Kyle, but he wasnā€™t the life of the party. He wasnā€™t adventurous. People could count on him, heā€™d been told throughout his life that he was level-headed, kind, and although those were positive qualities, they were about as exciting as a crossword puzzle.

Which made it all the more confounding. Beyond a general desire to somehow shake things up, Billy didnā€™t know what specific steps to take. He didnā€™t have a plan, or any real intent, to act on any of it beyond making a generic resolution. And even if he had, even if heā€™d planned on shifting his life in the direction it had seemingly taken of its own volition, that still didnā€™t explain how any of it was possible in the first place.

Heā€™d left the bar shortly before midnight. Kyle was still there, but, while the blonde beefcake had multiple midnight kisses to distribute to many eager women, Billy had still been on his own. He knew he could have shared in his friendā€™s bounty if heā€™d put forth the effort. Heā€™d caught several people eyeing him, and a few whoā€™d attempted conversation, but crowds made him uncomfortable. Billy could barely manage flirting when the place was empty, let alone when it was shoulder-to-shoulder and he had to shout to be heard. So heā€™d left. Heā€™d sent Kyle a text that said he was calling it a night, then pushed through the crowd and out the door Instead of pushing himself out of his comfort zone. Billy had spent the short, solo walk back to their apartment wrestling with the regret heā€™d immediately felt, blaming everything but his own uptight insecurity. Heā€™d finally appeased his anxious ego just before midnight with the resolutions for the coming year, never once expecting the universe to actually call him on it.

But as soon as the clock struck twelve, the changes started. Billy had just stripped down to his boxers and was preparing to crawl into bed when his whole body started to vibrate, like a cell phone ringing in his pocket but from head-to-toe. Fortunately the buzzing wasnā€™t painful, merely surprising, a sensation that grew exponentially when he caught sight of his stunned reflection in the mirror hanging on the back of his door.

Billy did a double-take at the sight of the stranger, already struggling to recognize himself. Instead of a short, generic crop, his chocolate mane had morphed into a stylized pompadour, buzzed at the sides but thick and wavy in the center. The altered hairdo made the changes below immediately apparent, as the shorn sides caused Billyā€™s sharpened features to stand out even more. No longer riding the line between cute and awkward, the brunette had become striking, with razor cheeks, plump, pouty lips, and a deceptively strong jaw. It was the face of a model, attached to a body that was racing to catch up. As he stood and stared with wide, stunned eyes, Billy watched his body begin to harden. The lean muscles didnā€™t grow larger, but they increasingly stood out as the modest definition he already possessed had magnified. His shoulders looked broader than ever, his toned pecs popped, his arms were strong and sturdy, and his abs had multiplied into an impressive washboard. It was the tight, tapering torso of a rock climber or a swimmer, not overly huge but deceptively built within its trim proportions.

Below the waist, however, things had taken an entirely different approach. Billyā€™s boxers had strained and tightened as, like Cinderella in reverse, the perky pumpkins they contained expanded into a meaty carriage at the stroke of midnight. The once-tiny cheeks ballooned to an impossible degree, decimating the tortured underwear in the process, and while their plump, pillowy size already bordered on the impossible, the colossal cakesā€™ heft was further accentuated by the now-ripped upper body that appeared to have been photoshopped on. Billy had been horrified as heā€™d watched his toned thighs expand to compensate, the widened thews rubbing together as they adopted their trunk-like proportions, but his dread was mitigated by a pulse of lust that caused his cock to rocket to attention. The unaltered organ looked less impressive than ever jutting out from its fleshy new surroundings, a fact that apparently mattered little as waves of arousal had knocked Billy off his feet.

The dazed pretty-boy had already been frantically clutching his inflated bottom, but instead of his stomach dropping at the sensation of the seemingly endless mounds squishing against his palms, it had begun to flutter. Each poke and prod of his fingers sent an electric bolt of bliss up his spine, and before Billy had even had time to think about what he was doing, he was watching his cock ooze and twitch as he instinctively rooted around inside himself. The experience was like nothing heā€™d ever felt before, and Billy had been equally enthralled and humiliated as heā€™d watched himself respond in kind. His beautiful new features contorted ecstatically, his increasing grunts and whimpers growing in both volume and frequency as he squirmed and writhed. Much to his embarrassment, the bashful brunette had been told by previous partners that he made ā€œcuteā€ faces in the throes of passion, and that trait had apparently been as amplified as the rest of him. Billy had already started to put the pieces together by that point, the impossible changes to his body lining up too conveniently with the resolution to be unrelated, but it wasnā€™t until he came a few moments later that his suspicions were confirmed.

Like the faces he made, those same partners had also commented on the now-bottom-heavy brunetteā€™s copious output. Billy may not have had the biggest cock or the heaviest balls, but when the time came he exploded like a fully loaded shotgun. And although such a skill had never once crossed the moaning manā€™s mind as a unique trait worth embracing, the universe apparently thought otherwise. Billy had been hit with a mix of mortified pride when heā€™d watched his cock finally explode, the untouched organ no longer blasting like a shotgun but erupting like a volcano. With a bevy of fingers stretching his virgin hole wide and lighting up his insides, the brunetteā€™s modest meat let loose with a spurting deluge.

As heā€™d watched load after relentless load splatter onto the mirror several feet away, Billy hadnā€™t known how to feel. Heā€™d always been relatively quick to cum, and just as quick to reload, but heā€™d never actually gotten off without somehow manipulating his eager rod. In that moment, though, heā€™d been able to push himself over the edge while ignoring the oozing organ entirely. And, further adding to Billyā€™s confusion, the ecstatic experience had been more intense than any orgasm heā€™d ever had before. Though heā€™d never engaged in any sort of anal activities in the past, the penetrated young man had quickly come to realize that having something inside him felt far better than being inside someone else.

Billy knew it was yet another impossible aspect of whatever strange circumstances were unfolding. Heā€™d always been curious. Heā€™d always wanted to try, to experiment in the bedroom, but heā€™d never been able to bring himself to, just like heā€™d never been able to bring himself to go after the partners he really wanted. But, as with so many aspects of his previous existence, it had become yet another moot point. There was no denying the images of Kyle swimming in his head as heā€™d furiously fingered himself, and there was no denying that his jealousy of the women waiting for his friendā€™s kiss had been the real reason heā€™d left the bar early. And even if he hadnā€™t been able to lock lips with the blonde hunk, Billy knew heā€™d run from the possibility of doing so with another man. Heā€™d wanted to for years, never quite mustering the courage to come out, or even secretly act on his hidden desires. He had no doubt that his friends and family would be supportive, especially Kyle, but heā€™d never been able to face the prospect of their attention, positive or otherwise. It would make him stand out either way, which was the last thing Billy ever wanted, so heā€™d always run in the direction of keeping quiet and blending in.

Now, thereā€™d be no more running. With his thunderous new thighs and bouncing, oversized bottom, Billy knew that a light jog would be the most he could manage, and it wouldnā€™t be away from attention. Even if heā€™d wanted to, there was no hiding his altered proportions, and the thought of obscuring his desires in the slightest suddenly struck him as dreadful. Hiding was no longer an option, a fact that became all too clear as a rush of new memories began pouring into Billyā€™s reeling brain. Gone were his drab days in an office, replaced by nights spent stripping and twerking on stage, his rocket launcher cock now a lustful party trick. And when his curvy cheeks and eager organ werenā€™t drawing in crowds at a club, Billy was putting both to use for his fans online. He didnā€™t just look like a new person; heā€™d actually become one.

ā€œHoly fuck,ā€ Billy chuckled as he lumbered to his feet. Far from fearful, he felt fantastic. The bottom-heavy brunette still clearly remembered his old life, and he was well aware that heā€™d just been warped into a thicc, pretty-boy power-bottom, but he couldnā€™t bring himself to feel anything other than joy over his impossible alterations. The full extent of the changes were also becoming increasingly clear as he looked around his room. Instead of his boxerā€™s tattered remains, a slinky copper thong rested at his feet, and a quick rummaging through his dresser revealed more of the same, along with a neon rainbow of jock straps, tiny shorts, and cropped tops, all seemingly chosen to draw as much attention as possible while showing off as much of his unique proportions as possible. As he held up a hot pink jockstrap and pictured what his plump pillows would look like wedged between the bright straps, Billy tried again to muster some of the embarrassment he knew he should feel. His colossal new rear would already be hanging out of the little shorts, and the eye-catching elastic would only make his exposure all the more noticeable, but it was pride that swelled at the thought, not dread.

There was a brief spark of that latter emotion a moment later when Billy heard the door to the apartment open. The sudden thought that he was about to be seen in his new state, that it was all about to become real and concrete, punched through the giddy haze, but it was quickly followed by a rush of excitement. As he dropped the jockstrap and sauntered naked to his bedroom door, there was no hesitation at all. Everything felt right, like his old life was the true nightmare and now heā€™d finally woken up, a feeling that was confirmed when he opened his door and saw Kyleā€™s bashful grin from across the living room.

ā€œYou bounced outta there pretty quick,ā€ the burly blonde said, eyeing his naked friend but otherwise acting as if Billyā€™s new look and lack of clothing was entirely normal.

The bottom-heavy brunette grinned and gave his hips a quick pop, sending obvious ripples through his thunderous backside. ā€œCanā€™t help it. I bounce wherever I go,ā€ he shrugged. Billyā€™s heart raced as he casually crossed the room, knowing what was coming but still surprised. His head spun at the duality of it all, how it simultaneously felt like the first time heā€™d exposed himself to his friend and the hundredth. That contrast between the novel and the familiar continued when he reached the other man and slipped his hands beneath Kyleā€™s fitted polo, the sensation of the soft golden fur against his palms feeling like both a secret dream come true and an everyday occurrence. Without another word, Billy roughly shoved his friend against the wall, leaning in for a long, lingering kiss in a display of confident aggression that would have been entirely out of character before. Now, the ripped brunette was fully in charge, his cock throbbing as Kyleā€™s large, calloused hands began kneading his ample rear. ā€œHappy New Year,ā€ he purred when he finally let his friend come up for air. ā€œDidnā€™t think youā€™d want me doing this to you in the bar at midnight.ā€

Billy couldnā€™t believe how cute the square-jawed stud looked as his friendā€™s face went crimson. ā€œYouā€™re the only guy I let kiss me like that,ā€ Kyle sputtered, clearly uncomfortable but just as clearly interested in continuing the exchange. His hands were still locked on Billyā€™s fat rear and their noses brushed as he spoke.

ā€œLucky me,ā€ the naked man chuckled, his hands deftly undoing the fly of Kyleā€™s jeans. With a quick shove he sent his friendā€™s pants and boxers to the other manā€™s ankles, his hand latching onto the long, girthy cock that flopped free. ā€œAnd how many guys get to do this,ā€ he asked, giving Kyleā€™s twitching log a few tugs.

The blonde sighed and let his head fall back against the wall. ā€œI can count ā€˜em on one hand,ā€ he said, his powerful arms flexing as he peeled out of his tight polo. Unlike Billyā€™s lean, chiseled physique, Kyleā€™s frame was broad and strapping with rough-hewn bulk, sporting a thick, seven-inch log and churning balls that perfectly fit his rugged muscle. ā€œBut no one does it like you.ā€

ā€œObviously,ā€ Billy said, working his lips down Kyleā€™s wide neck and through the light coating of fur on his friendā€™s meaty pecs. Despite the blondeā€™s blustering about ā€œlettingā€ Billy have his way, the toned brunette knew the bigger man was putty in his hands. Heā€™d always been secretly jealous of the few guys at Kyleā€™s gym who his friend had drunkenly admitted to fooling around with in the past, but now those days were long gone. Billy began to remember the dynamics of their current relationship, how their years of friendship had developed into the kind of easy physical intimacy that heā€™d always longed for. It was non-labeled and non-committal, though it usually took priority for both of them.

Still, despite everyone knowing how Billy made his money, and despite everyone correctly assuming about what went on at home, Kyle wasnā€™t ready to publicly indulge in that facet of their friendship. But Billy didnā€™t mind. Now, instead of leaving early out of anxiety, heā€™d left early to let his friend make a public show of making out with a few women at the bar. Heā€™d known what the other man really wanted, and heā€™d known it wouldnā€™t be long before he followed. If heā€™d been wrong, if Kyle had decided to hook up with one of the ladies, that was okay too. The blonde would come home at some point, and Billy was starting to recall just how many new friends he had to keep himself busy with in the meantime.

But, as Kyleā€™s whimpers attested, he hadnā€™t been wrong. Billy could feel his friend squirming as he lapped at the blondeā€™s nubby nipples, his own smaller cock about to erupt from the bigger manā€™s relentless groping. ā€œLooked like you had your pick back thereā€¦not interested in any of the ladies,ā€ he asked before finally working his lips down the trail of hair that bisected Kyleā€™s muscle gut.

ā€œNone of ā€˜em were as pretty as you,ā€ the blonde grinned, batting his thick log against Billyā€™s face when the brunette dropped to his knees.

ā€œAre you talking to me or your dick,ā€ the brunette asked, running his tongue along the side of his friendā€™s wide shaft. A part of Billy was still amazed at how easy it had all become, how effortless and natural it felt to be naked on his knees not just with Kyle, but with anyone. There was no insecurity or anxiety, only the giddy lust that they both eagerly indulged in. Billy wasnā€™t thinking about the fact that he was swallowing his friendā€™s cock as his softened lips wrapped around the aching organ. He wasnā€™t thinking about anything at all, other than how content he was in the moment. With his nostrils full of Kyleā€™s potent musk and his face swallowed by the other manā€™s meaty thighs, Billy could have sucked away until sunrise. Heā€™d always enjoyed getting a blowjob, but he was quickly realizing just how much heā€™d always wanted to give one, adding an oral element to the surprising new needs now dictating his bedroom activities.

And he wasnā€™t alone. ā€œOkayā€¦okayā€¦fuuuuuuck this feels goodā€¦ā€ Kyle groaned, his fingers stroking through Billyā€™s chocolate scalp. ā€œ...I want my turnā€¦ā€ he said, giving a sharp, short gasp when the other man latched onto his granite bubble and swallowed him to the hilt a final time before reluctantly pulling away.

Billy climbed to his feet and grabbed Kyle by the slick cock, pulling the blonde along behind him. He headed for his friendā€™s room, the thought of being fucked in the same bed as some random woman from the bar only adding to his arousal. As he climbed up onto the mattress and buried his face in Kyleā€™s musky sheets, the knowledge that he was about to be eaten out like one of them turned him on more than he ever imagined. ā€œAnd how many guys do you do THIS with,ā€ Billy asked, lifting his hips into the air.

ā€œGuys? Just you. But you can thank the girls for giving me so much practice,ā€ Kyle grunted with a smug grin. He gave Billyā€™s cheeks a rough squeeze before diving in, his scruffy stubble sending bolts of ecstasy through the spasming brunette as it scratched against his friendā€™s eager hole.

Billy knew there was a practical element to burying his face against Kyleā€™s bedding. Beyond the thrill of knowing his face rested where the other manā€™s naked body slumbered, it also muffled the bellowing moans Billy was now unable to contain. As Kyleā€™s nimble tongue and capable lips rooted around in the comically deep valley between his oversized cheeks, the spasming brunette howled like a man possessed. Those wails became hoarse and guttural when Kyleā€™s tongue was replaced by a pair of fingers, with Billyā€™s untouched cock erupting like a geyser after only a few moments.

ā€œIā€™m starting to think you only want to do this in here because it keeps your bed clean,ā€ Kyle laughed, flipping the panting brunette over onto his back. Using Billyā€™s copious load for lube, he hefted his friendā€™s supple thighs onto his shoulders and plunged in, pressing against the brunetteā€™s toned pecs to keep him from thrashing up off the bed.

ā€œFuuuuuuuuuckā€¦ā€ Billy moaned, wild-eyed and slack-jawed. His hands clutched at the sheets as Kyleā€™s hips started rolling, rapidly pushing him beyond speech. With each grunting whimper he could feel his face twisting the way it had earlier in the mirror, and he could see those exaggerated expressions reflected in his friendā€™s satisfied smile, but Billy was helpless to stop them. They were like blinking or breathing, something that his body did on its own outside of his control.

But Billy didnā€™t actually want to stop them. As he bucked and writhed at the end of Kyleā€™s capable rod, as his own unattended cock rapidly raced towards another release, Billy experienced that same perfect contentment that he had on his knees. He felt connected to Kyle in a way that went beyond mere friendship, knowing full well that he was safe and secure in strong, capable hands. People followed Billy online specifically because of the wild abandon he exhibited, but with the brawny blonde there was none of the voyeurism or judgment that came with a performance or from a partner with expectations. With Kyle, Billy could just be himself and know that his friend loved him regardless.

Which isnā€™t to say that the bigger man didnā€™t enjoy the show. Watching Billyā€™s pure, uninhibited desire was infectious, allowing him to ignore the baggage that came from being so turned on by another man. The bottom-heavy brunette was like a force of nature, something that transcended the trappings of ā€œgayā€ and ā€œstraightā€ altogether. More than anything, Kyle was just grateful to have someone as outgoing and unique as Billy in his life at all. He clamped his hand over the penetrated pretty-boyā€™s mouth when his friend erupted again, muffling the shrill, piercing cry that he knew was coming.

ā€œWhoooā€¦that was aā€¦big oneā€¦ā€ Kyle grunted, grinning at the sight of the brunetteā€™s glistening, cum-slick face and torso after Billy finished blasting all over himself. His friendā€™s breath was hot against his palm as the other man huffed and panted, but the burly blonde left it in place as he gave a final thrust of his own, exploding into the brunetteā€™s battered bottom. He collapsed onto Billy as soon as he was done, his furry torso matting with the other manā€™s release as they writhed together in another kiss.

ā€œBest way to start the year,ā€ Billy sighed, his toned legs tangled with Kyleā€™s sturdy trunks as they lingered in each otherā€™s arms.

ā€œYou are not wrong,ā€ Kyle chuckled, leaning in for another kiss. ā€œGot any resolutions?ā€

Billy shrugged. ā€œHonestly? I wouldnā€™t change a thing.ā€